Insane Troll Logic 6.13.11

Uh oh! It seems I’ve pissed off the Shakespeare Deniers, the least ridiculous form of denialism of them all. I considered putting out an all Shakespeare Denialism edition of my Insane Troll Logic series two weeks ago but so many trolls showed up all of a sudden on my one and only piece referencing that particular form of woo that it’s better I just link to that entry so those who are interested can read through the full comments section themselves and enjoy them in all their glory.

But this entry in the series will just focus on my most recent comment from commenter Smith on my ever-unpopular troll-attracting piece on Quantum Jumping:

It is mind boggling how pathetic you haters sound out there. The guy is NOT (i repeat for you morons out there, NOT) trying to rip anyone off, he states himself that this method is not a scientific breakthrough, and that he looks upon it himself as a placebo effect in itself.

This is a form of meditation that COULD work but only if you allow your brain to really focus. Admittedly, it is unfair to label this as tapping into alternate realities, because while those may exist, we will need more than placebo effects to tap into them. However, this does nothing to rip the people off. It is not the guy’s fault if some people are stupid enough to buy the cd and not believe in the stuff they are doing. It is the person behind the meditation that has the power to focus.

Now, i am not going to attempt to pretend that alternate realities is the foundation of this meditation (every product has a silver lining of bullshit), but in a way, it could be useful if you let it relax your mind. What most people need is relaxation and the motivation these days. If you go look at most successful people, you will find their childhoods filled with the fighting of evil forces that try to pin down their hopes and eradicate their self motivation, but they push it back.

This is not meant for laughter, those of you who stupidly criticize this product truly have no significant value of self worth, you are people who demand spoon feeding, people who wait for something to do the work for them. It will not kill you if you tried to meditate and used your brain to achieve success rather than come online and bitch about placebo effects when you don’t know what the hell you are talking about.

But for the morons out there, the placebo effect is a powerful one indeed, and if scientists told you that a device had been invented and it would tap into alternate realities, and they strapped it onto your head, you would never realize it was made of plastic. If you truly believe in something, there is a way to make it happen.

Anyone who labels this a scam or a piece of undignified crap, needs a reality check. Your poor judgement’s often reflect your own flaws, and weaknesses. You make excuses like (some people bought this crap). But it is not money that is the issue, as we all know, we can get this stuff for free if we need it. You just refuse to believe flat out in self meditation. The joke is on the poor bastards who come here and try to sound smart in any significant way.

This is nothing new, every product you buy (including the laptop you used to write down your bullshit), has some lie to it. But in the world of quantum physics, you have no lie or truth, because as of today, nothing has been proven completely. Either use it for benefits, or stop humiliating yourselves.

It’s mind-blowing how many people will so passionately defend an unambiguous scam, especially one that you claim the scam artist freely admits is a scam. That’s what attributing results to the placebo effect means. It’s a subtle way of avoiding responsibility to actually deliver promised results using a term that most laypeople don’t understand. And nowhere on at least the main page of his website does he mention the placebo effect. What he DOES do on the first page is reference at least a dozen of the greatest scientific minds in history and try to suggest their findings somehow validate his pseudo-scientific claims when they most certainly do not by any stretch of anyone’s imagination.

“This is a form of meditation that COULD work but only if you allow your brain to really focus.”
Again, no it can’t. He’s not saying this is all in your head as you imagine a fictional conversation with a fictional alternate version of yourself. He’s literally claiming “thought transference” with a literal version of yourself from a literal alternate dimension.

Bert’s website goes on to say:
“Quantum Theory suggests that our physical reality is nothing but a very elaborate mirage. A super-hologram of information and energy. A Matrix.”
Quantum Theory says no such thing and The Matrix is a FICTIONAL movie. I’ve seen Keanu Reeves in person. He can’t really dodge bullets. That was just a movie.

“It is not the guy’s fault if some people are stupid enough to buy the cd and not believe in the stuff they are doing. ”
Actually, it is his fault for charging people for a service he knows he can’t possibly provide and deliberately deceiving people by exploiting scientific ignorance. This is a criminal offense known as fraud. I have no problem with people meditating to lower their blood pressure or just to relax; meditation is free. What Burt is selling is not simple meditation but a pseudo-scientific scam.

“you are people who demand spoon feeding, people who wait for something to do the work for them.”
No, we’re people who demand companies comply with fair business practices and don’t cheat their customers. I fail to see how any thinking person could interpret that as unreasonable.

“It will not kill you if you tried to meditate and used your brain to achieve success rather than come online and bitch about placebo effects when you don’t know what the hell you are talking about. ”
Fortunately, our criminal system doesn’t demand that victims actually die before justice and appropriate remedies can be served. Not so fortunate, however, for guys like Bernard Madoff and Burt.

“If you truly believe in something, there is a way to make it happen.”
This is called delusion. It’s not a good thing.

“Anyone who labels this a scam or a piece of undignified crap, needs a reality check. ”
Oh, do tell.

“But it is not money that is the issue, as we all know, we can get this stuff for free if we need it. ”
Oh, well as long as Burt’s only stealing a little money for his bullshit services, that’s okay. You must have attended one hell of a good law school.

“You just refuse to believe flat out in self meditation. ”
Um, no. I’m actually a fan of meditation. What I’m much less of a fan of is assholes who exploit scientific ignorance to scam the public and those who shamelessly defend them.

“This is nothing new, every product you buy (including the laptop you used to write down your bullshit), has some lie to it.”
This is called the tu quoque fallacy. Just because everyone else is doing it, it doesn’t make it okay. I also categorically reject your false equivalence between what might be tiny lies and big honking nonsense piled on top of a foundation of total bullshit that contributes to the overall scientific ignorance of the public.

“But in the world of quantum physics, you have no lie or truth, because as of today, nothing has been proven completely.”
Quantum physics–you keep using those words; I do not think they mean what you think they mean.

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2 Responses to Insane Troll Logic 6.13.11

  1. Tom says:

    Thanks for the post. When I came upon Burt’s site I was once more amazed at the at the creativity of these new age nut cases. Burt admits later it’s a placebo? Bullish*t! If he said it up front, “Hey! Want a new way of looking at the world that will skip your brain laterally (a la’ de Bono) and allow you to cnsider new possibilities? Try imagining this: . . .” THEN everyone would know right up front what he was offering and could buy with eyes wide open.

    In fact, that’s exactly what I did and guess what? I got some interesting feedback for my challenges. It helped me think more creatively to imagine in some other universe I had actually come up with a new idea, a new approach to the problem I was dealing with (of course, the fact that the “problem”‘was all in my head i.e. A challenge of motivation, helped a lot in gaining a solution! After all, if I’m the problem then I’m the solution, too.

    But Burt doesn’t say that. At least not in the three minutes of his free video I bothered to listen to.

    Other people sell their creative thinking honestly. But hey don’t sell as much as these scammers, I guess because they don’t promise unlimited wealth and happiness, quickly and easily and with no effort In fact, they tell you it takes work and nothing is guaranteed.

    The saps!

  2. Tom K. says:

    I too, was amazed at Burt’s program and how much he charges for it. Nevertheless, I could see it’s value as a piece of imaginative brainstorming. I personally don’t understand why these scam artists don’t just admit up front it’s all mind games. People would still buy it! People buy bottled water and spend hundreds of dollars on water soluble vitamins they’re body can’t possibly absorb giving them the most expensive pee in the world! Why wouldn’t they buy a CD program promising to give them some new and unique perspectives by imaging in another universe there is a version of them that has solved this problem.

    I believe some psychotherapists call this “The Miracle Story,” or something to that effect. “Imagine you woke up tomorrow and your problem was solved. What would that be like?” This puts the client in touch with an imagined life where their problem no longer dominates them. This can interrupt their habituated pattern of dysfunctional thinking/feeling just long enough to allow their mind to conceive of a life without their problem.

    I am a sometimes busker and have a performance where I play an old west snake oil salesman (and bye the bye, real snake oil works), selling “powerfully potent, patently productive, positively prevailing Placebo Pills! 100% Guaranteed to be effective 35-68% of the time!” The audience response is always positive and guess what? People come up afterwards and want to buy my pills! Just not for the price I’m selling them. $49.95 for a three month supply. I also include a certificate of authenticity!

    So instead I offer to sell them a sheet of the labels for just $9.95 so they can make their own placebos pills at home! I have had takers for that.

    My mind is a wonderful, fascinating place, filled with stories I’ve yet to explore. So is your mind. It’s all made up. And if it helps us live our lives in reality more effectively I’m all for it. Just don’t believe it’s real. That leads to psychosis.

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